American's generally have a warped view of Australia. For the 2000 Olympics, there were truly tourists who expected to see kangaroos hoping down the streets of Sydney. In reality, Sydney is a modern metropolis with the most beautiful harbor in the world. However, travel just a few hours out, and you are confronted with a completely different world. A world where rum, utes (think el caminos) and strong hair spray rule... and Kangaroos truly do roam the streets.
 
This weekend was the annual Goulburn Rugby Ball, which I have been lucky enough to attend for the past 3 years. Most of the younger members of the community attend, in full regalia. Usually Konky and go it alone, but this year we brought a crew in from Sydney. We all logged up at Lockyersleigh, Konky's property outside of Goulburn. While many took the opportunity to ride horses, I always like to do a bit of trail riding. Being that it was about 0 degrees, I had to get rugged up a bit more than usual, and ended up looking a bit like a window licker.

The ball started out civil enough. There was some disappointment that the event planners decided to hold the event on the night of the most important rugby match of the year, the Bledisloe cup. I had placed a twenty five dollar bet on the game, and was a bit disappointed myself that I didn't get to watch it (even though I lost my money). The first shout I purchased consisted of one rum, one beer and a bottle of Champagne, and cost a whopping $11.30. While speeches were made, and an auction was held to raise money for the team, we all poked at the horrible mystery dinner that was served to us. There was anticipation in the air for the Lumpy Underdacks to take the stage, and the dancing to begin. An announcement was made that dessert was being served in the "smoker's lounge", and it all went downhill.